It’s Okay To Want To Be Loved!

As a minister, I have the privilege of getting to meet & talk to lots & lots & lots of people & the one thing most of them have in common is that they all want to love & be loved.  And that’s okay!  There is nothing wrong with wanting that.  For many reasons people have a hard time admitting that without sounding desperate.  It took me a while to understand why.  It seems that being honest about wanting to be loved makes people feel & appear to be weak or vulnerable.  In addition, it also makes them look at themselves in a negative way if they don’t have the love they want; kinda like they are defective in some way.  So they bottle the need for love up inside themselves until its bursts out in some form of desperation.  And we all know how that looks; on ourselves & on others right?

Let’s kick this around for a little while.  We all may want love in our lives but what about all the crap still going on inside of us?  Will someone still love us once they find out about it?  How many people have you cut out of your life once you found out about their crap?  So what do we do? In the effort to hind our crap, we swing the pendulum way to the other side & we start lying & playing games with people because we don’t want them to ever see who we truly are.  Now everybody including you says they hate people who play games but if that were true why are so many people still doing it?  What’s up with that?

Come on let’s be honest.  Don’t you just wish someone understood, respected, appreciated & loved you just the way you are today; with all your mess & cuckoo crazy?  Of course you do!  That’s what we all want because we all have some cuckoo crazy inside of us.  And there’s a reason that you want to be loved. It’s because God made you that way. God built you for close intimacy – a close satisfying relationship that makes you be better & encourages you to do the impossible!

Well, why don’t you have that?  The answer is simple.  You don’t have the love you want because you’re looking for it in all the wrong places.  I know it sounds corny but its true.  If we all just looked into our relationship history we would probably find out just how true it is.  I know it was that way for me.  Even though I can laugh about it now, I can’t believe so of the jokers I dated!  I have to admit I was looking for someone to fill a hole inside of me that I couldn’t fill myself. What was your reason?

The key to getting the love you want is to start with the only love relationship that matters.  And that’s the love relationship between you & God!  He created you to have an up close & personal relationship with Him first, and then He will bring others into your life who will love you properly.  That’s after He teaches you to love properly.   So, our 1st problem is we have not made having a love relationship with God a priority.  What do you really know about God?  How much time do you spend learning about God & getting to know Him? Matthew 6:25-34 sums it up nicely for us as Jesus tells us not to worry about anything in this life because God has you covered but I really want to focus on Matthew 6:33 (amp) which says,  But seek ([a]aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness ([b]His way of doing and being right), and then all these things [c]taken together will be given you besides.  So you can see that everything you want & need comes out of this scripture.  If you seek love, seek God first.

Its ok to want to be lovedIn the presence of God is the only place where you can reveal your deepest, craziest stuff & not be judged.  In the presence of God is the only place where God will take your stinkiest crap & replace it with something golden!  Check out what David says about being in the presence of God in Psalms 16:11 (amp); You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.  You can’t get this from anyone else but God.  David gives us another great example in Psalms 63:1-3 (msg); God—you’re my God!  I can’t get enough of you! I’ve worked up such hunger and thirst for God,  traveling across dry and weary deserts. 2-4 So here I am in the place of worship, eyes open,  drinking in your strength and glory. In your generous love I am really living at last!  My lips brim praises like fountains. I bless you every time I take a breath;  my arms wave like banners of praise to you.  Even as David sat in the wilderness of Judah with all the pressure & stress that brought, he knew all was well as long as he could be with God.

Sin has caused a wedge between God & us so we started seeking what we need in worldly places & people.  But God created you to hang out with Him so He can reveal Himself to you showing you things that will change you forever!  He will heal your soul by washing away all your past hurts & pains.  He will heal your body from every sickness & disease.  He will free you everything that binds you freeing you to deal with all your “perfect imperfections” as John Legends likes to call it.  None of us are perfect but we are made perfect by hanging out with God.  So as you spend time with God, His love will flow to you and as you learn to love yourself that love will flow out to others.  Then the love you want will find you!  I know, another corny line, but it’s true.  It worked for me & it will work for you.

It’s okay to want to be loved & God wants to love you too! Please let Him!